Ok. this is going to be a long drawn out post of my thoughts... buckle up!

Man killed over a pack of cigarettes

Ok, so quite some time ago (more than 10 years, less than 20) there was a party at some house in Tulsa.  Well a fight ensued over the "last popsicle" in the freezer and some kid was shot because he took the last popsicle.  SHOT OVER A POPSICLE! So anyway, I was reading the Tulsa world headlines from yesterday I think (I should check my e-mail more often) and there was a guy in OKC who was killed in a fight that started over a pack of cigarettes.  I didn't read the arcticle, just the little blurb below the headline, but really, is something like popsicles and cigarettes worth the rest of yours and someone elses life?

"you must be a special kind of person to do what you do"

Yeah and you must be an exceptional idiot.  Ok, I understand that some people just shouldn't work with individuals with disabilities due to many different reasons.  One of which is total and complete ignorance.  Guess what folks... you're not going to get what they have (unless ofcourse they have a cold or something like that).  Autism is NOT contagious, Down Syndrome is NOT contagious, angelmans syndrome is NOT contagious, cerebral palsey is NOT contagious.  I could go on, but you get what I mean.  I am a job coach for individuals with disabilities and what they have is NOT contagious. 

When I tell people what I do they always say "well you must be a special kind of person to do that" or something along those lines.  My response is always "I enjoy it".  What do you say to that?  Do people really respond with"yeah, I am!"? At first the comment just made me uncomfortable, as I am no different than anybody else.  I get frustrated, I don't know what to say in certain situations, I'm afraid of my own frickin shadow, how am I any different from those people who say that I'm a "special kind of person"?  The major difference, I'm accepting... they arn't.  If more people would see the folks I take care of more as humans and less as hinderances, this world would become a beautiful place.  Oh yeah and guess what.... those folks that I take care of... they don't care if you accept them or not.  They're world will continue turning even if you are afraid and ignorant. :-) thats what makes me feel great about my job.

FML

For those of you who arn't familiar with FML.com it stands for f**k my life.  Crappy things happen to people so they decide to go online and post semi-anonamously (sp?) their issue and end it with FML.  Thats STUPID!  Is the fact that grandma got you teddy grahams instead of oreos really that  much of an issue?  And are you going to insist that your life sucks because your grandma doesn't know what afterschool snack you prefer.  I see the majority of the FML posters to be between the ages 12 and 19 (if your between those ages, sorry) and female. And the most of them are probably kids from upper middle to upper class parents who have spoiled them their whole life.  A guy I met a couple of years ago while "camping" is on my facebook.  And when FML was starting to hit facebook he started his own called JML (Just my luck) to which he could use it positively or negatively.  For example: I got an A on my mid-term! JML.  Or Its raining on the same day of our company picnic at the zoo. JML.  As opposed to FML which is not only completely negative, but very dramatically negative.  The worlds not going to end if you realize "Mr. Right" isn't really Mr. Right.  Sulk, cry and move on. 

So those are my thoughts, as it is right now.  If someone takes your last popsicle, your last pack of cigarettes or a rock that you are pretty sure was yours ask yourself is getting this upset over something so trivial worth chillin in jail (or worse) for the next 20 years to life? If you see someone with a disability, say hi, you may meet a new friend who doesn't care what kind of car you drive or what kind of job you have, just that you are willing to talk to them.  And if you think FML after everything that happens in your life that isn't quite how you wanted it, I would recommend re-evaluating your principals and starting fresh with some that arn't so restricting.

Yeah... I live in Norman... SO!

Ok... So since my last blog, I've moved to Norman. I got a job selling insurance, passed my exam (that everybody said was almost impossible to pass) became a licensed insurance producer for the state of Oklahoma... then promptly quit my job.


Thats right ladies and gentlemen.... I hated it. It was not a good fit and I was miserable and wasting money and earning NOTHING! No more sales for me. I think the biggest downfall of that company was that they wanted me to go INTO peoples houses and sell them insurance. Not only is that not safe... but I really didn't enjoy trying to convince people that they needed this insurance when I knew they didn't. Car insurance they need. Health insurance they need. Supplemental life and health insurance not so much. Thats like adding insurance to your insurance.


WEEEELLLL As for living here, its ok. I don't like the fact that I don't know where anything is. I'm learning though. I can get around Norman (for the most part) without help... but if I leave Norman (or the part I know) I have to use the mapping program on my phone. Which is a pain, but managable. I miss that I can just go out to my car and go to a friends house. I don't really have any friends here... other than Adam... and I don't need to go anywhere to go to his house.


And then theres Adam.... I really like living with Adam. Its interesting. We're learning how to live with each other. We're both very different but we're adjusting to each others quirks very nicely. We've figured out (daily living wise) how to adapt to each other.

You know the whole saying, "Don't go to bed angry"... well I've tried to live as close to that as possible. Most of our disagreements are at night because we're both tired and both edgy. And we're both extremely stubborn. Which makes not going to bed angry more difficult. Its completely doable but more difficult.

But hes great. He does random stuff just to make me happy. For example one night we were in bed... watching friends... and I was hungry. It was about 9:30 (yes I go to bed at 9:30 because thats when Adam goes to bed cause he has to wake up at 5:30 to go to work) and I said "I'm hungry, lets go to sonic" and after a conversation about something else entirely, he gets up and starts getting dressed. I said where are you going (thinking he'd forgotten about the sonic comment) and he said "going to Sonic". Theres lots more but I'm sure you don't wanna hear about it.

He is also very supportive of my relationships with my friends. I hear when you get into a long-term relationship that you lose your friends. They either become "our friends" or they dissappear all together. Well in this case they didn't. People that I spent most of my time with prior to moving, I still spend most of my time (phone time really) with. Its true. He's a really great guy.


We're hopefully moving to the City this Summer. I really don't like the apartment. I feel we're always bumping into each other. Its too small and the location SUCKS! It would be a great location if I were going to school at OU but I'm not. He drives over an hour to and from work every day. (I don't currently have a job) and in order to get on a highway we have to drive quite a bit. Plus theres currently construction on I-35 which also hinders my ability to get anywhere in any decent amount of time.


So yeah, thats my life... in Norman..... right now.

Count down to Norman

Hey, its Monday and i'm pretty sure the plan is to move me on Saturday. So less than one week and i will be co-habitating with my favorite guy.

I just can't wait!

Tonight is a going away party for me with my dinner group. I'm excited, we're going to be eating coups de tat. haha I actually dont remember what its called but Philippe says that its chicken. I trust him.... i think. Atleast its not Rocky Mountain Oysters. I know what those are, and i'm NOT interested. haha!

My amazing boyfriend!

OK...... i have resisted writing this just as long as i could. But i think i'm going to go ahead and write it and get it out of my head.

Ummmm my boyfriend is amazing. I met him about 6 years ago (the time differs between us because my memory is better than his....haha). And not long after i started working at his moms company. But after working "together" for several years he quit and moved to Kansas. He moved back not long after that and he started filling in at the house i worked at. We exchanged "Myspace" information and a friendship was born. Adam and i took a trip together to Chicago (adventuresinchicagoland.blogspot.com). That trip bonded us as friends. We have since taken two more trips together (which are also on that blog).

Adam and I have had our ups and downs. At one point our low point was so low, I never thought we'd recover. I thought for sure I had lost him forever. I confided in a friend about how i felt about him and how i felt about our friendship being over. I realized at that point that i wasn't ready to let go of what we could have. But when i tried to reach out, he wasn't ready to reach back. Yes, at first it hurt. But then i figured if it was meant to be it will happen. Well not long after.... he reached back.

In September, he asked me to move in with him. At first I was leery. I had always lived with my mom (or at School) and i was comfortable with my position. Not to mention he lives in Norman and I live in Tulsa which is 2 hours from one another. Which means I would have to quit my job, and leave most of my family. After talking to a couple influential people in my life i decided to go ahead and do it.

After i decided to go ahead and move, Adam and I grew closer and closer. We had several phone conversations about "our" future. Well he brought some friends into Tulsa for a concert and we spent some time together and after the night was over he went back to Norman. Well shortly after midnight on November 23rd he called me. Well i was asleep but apparently answered the phone anyway (my ring isn't loud enough to wake me up, and i don't remember answering the phone.). We talked for a while and i kept hinting that i wanted to "further" our relationship and he kept turning it around on me. Well at one point I was so frustrated with him, I told him "it doesn't matter, i already tell people you're my boyfriend anyway." Well he laughed and said "well alright". Which really epitomizes our friendship, I'm the emotion and he accepts it and rolls with it.

Well at first i thought "this is gonna be weird". I went to his apartment on Thanksgiving (after my family thing) cause we were leaving the next day to go to Ft. Worth. Thats when i realized that it wasn't "weird", it felt very natural. Being with Adam is just as amazing if we were just walking around a statue of horses or if he was holding me because i was shivering because it was sssoooo cold or if it were more..... Yeah, it is awesome. Adam is awesome.

Well with in the last month.... we have celebrated his birthday (much to his shagrin), spent our first Christmas and new years together, and we spent so much time together. He is so supportive, very sweet, incredibly caring and more than I had ever hoped for. He calls me every day. He always asks about my day, no matter how crappy or fantastic his day was. He always ends every conversatiom with "I'll call you later" or "I'll call you tomorrow". He takes care of me, even when i'm not looking. I'm pretty sure hes done stuff that i havent even noticed. I'm not quite sure how his past relationships have let him go. But I will be eternally greatful. I'm hoping that I will never have to make that sacrifice.

Recently, i had this horrific headache. We were at his apartment and it started in my neck and travelled up into my head. It was the worst pain i had ever been in. I had gone in to the front room and went to sleep on the couch. He came in and realized how much pain i was in.... so he fixed the bed room to where it was completely dark, and he turned up the heat in the apartment so it would be warm when i got out of the shower. Well i went and layed down, got up a little later and took a shower and layed back down. He surfaced later and brought me food, medication and some TLC. What a simply amazing boyfriend i have. I love him very much and sometimes I feel as if I dont let him know how much he means to me.


Just so you know. :-)



Mary

My New Years 2009

Yeah... I posted this on my other blog, so I copied and pasted it here.

New Years eve 2008
I got off work at three, but Adam didn't get off work until 6. So I hung around Tulsa for a bit... Shanell straightened my hair and I ended up leaving Tulsa (well really Sandsprings) at 5. So needless to say, I didn't make it to the City before Adam got off work. I made pretty good time though.Anyway, I met Adam at his work, and we took his car to Bricktown (which for those of you not familiar with this place, its a whole lot of restraunts, stores and even some weird man made waterway. Its pretty cool), and we walked around.

Mexican food restraunt
Thats what I'm calling it, as I have no idea what the name of it is. We origionally put down our name for Zios and then went to check out the mexican food restraunt, and there was no wait there, so we ditched Zios and went to the Mexican food restraunt. Anyway, our waitor was a bit pushy, but its probably because there was so many people there he was probably running on adrenaline alone. So I wasn't too worried about it. I got what I always get in new Mexican food restraunts and that is a Chimichanga. Those are pretty hard to mess up. Adam got Fajitas. We were talking and observing people, and wait staff. It was interesting. If you are ever around Adam and I when we're observing people, you're in for quite a treat. We say what we think these peoples story is. And sometimes its real elaborate, and sometimes its not. The more the people, the more interesting it gets. So after dinner, we pay and take off.

Snow tubing at the baseball park
No, before you ask, we did not snow tube. But Adam heard about this huge snow mound that people could tube down in the middle of the baseball park in Bricktown. So we went to check it out. Well it was $10 for an hour and a half, as much tubing as you could handle for that much time. What it really was, was slides covered in snow or ice or something. Well Adam and I watched this for quite some time. We talked about some of the things people were wearing on that freezing cold day. There were some guys who were wearing some Jedi looking robes, they were brown with hoods. So of course there were some jokes thrown around about "if I had that robe...". And after we left we decided to just walk around Bricktown.

Toby Keiths I love this Bar and Grill
So when Adam and I were in Ft. Worth he got this drink called "the three stooges" at the comedy club we went to. Well he took a picture of the ingredients and we decided it was time for a drink. (and time to go inside as I was FREEZING!) Well we went to Toby Keiths I love this Bar and Grill because we knew it was a restraunt but we figured there would be a seperate bar (as it says Bar AND Grill). But there was no place at the bar for us, so Adam went to the bathroom, that was so conveniently labeled "Whos yo daddy" as the boys restroom. (I didn't go to the womens restroom so I don't know what that one was labeled) As our bar sitting was not going to happen, we left this fine establishment and went looking for another bar.

Redpin? Bowling Alley Bar
I think its called Redpin (which is why there is a question mark). Well we went in there, found 2 seats together and got ourselves a drink. I had a LIT (ask if you don't know what that is) and Adam got his Three Stooges drink. Well at first the bartender was there, listening to what we had to say, but the longer we were there (sadly we were only there about 1 1/2 hours) the less he payed attention to us. Adam only had that one drink (which was ALL alcohol), and I had 1 1/2 LITs and a glass of water. Anyway, we were trying to "tab out" for about 30 minutes, but the bartender never came back. I finally (after getting PISSED OFF) went and retrieved him. I told Adam not to tip him. Adam aaaalllllmost gave him an 8 dollar tip, but ended up not tipping. Our service was THAT bad. (I almost NEVER don't leave a tip) Usually if the service is mediocre I leave 10 percent, but our service would have been a huge leap if it was mediocre.

Apparently Alex, Jordan and Liz were there
My brother married a lady by the name of Victoria. I call her Vicki. She had 2 previous children named Alex and Jordan(I refer to them as my niece and nephew) and her sisters name is Liz. Well I didn't find this out until the next day when Vicki called me, but Jordan saw me and yelled my name and I didn't even hear him. Poor kid. I would have gone to visit him, had I heard him beckon. Oh well, maybe after I move we can have some Aunt time.


Waiting for fireworks
We decided that we were going to walk towards the car, it was nearing midnight and it was cold, and Adam had to be at work the next day, so we needed to leave after the fire works. So when we got to this street corner I noticed it was a couple of minutes before midnight, so we just stood there and waited for the fireworks. I stuck my arms inside Adams jacket, and held on to him and he put his arm around me (my hair was in his face) and we stood like that through the fireworks. (which were fun) Then we went to the car and he drove me back to my car.

DUI checkpoint in Norman
If you read this whole post, you will remember I said I had 1 1/2 LITs (and a glass of water). Well when I saw the check point I was like "CRAP!!!". Well I rolled down my window and the officer says "This is a DUI check point, trying to make sure everyone is safe on the road, have you had anything to drink tonight?" my immediate response was "uhhh no." He thanked me and informed me that my right headlight was out. Is it against the law to lie to a cop? I hope not, cause I did. I wasn't drunk by any stretch of the imagination, I wasn't even buzzed. But I figured if I said, yeah I had a LIT earlier tonight, I would open pandoras box.

The next morning
Poor Adam, he had to get up the next morning and go to work, since we didn't have his laptop (which is what he uses for an alarm) we had set both of our phones alarms and he has an alarm that I set in his room. Well normally when the alarm goes off and I'm there, I touch him in some way, run my fingers through his hair, across his cheek or rub his back. Well this time I was so tired, that I pushed him and said "time to get up" he was probably thinking, where is that sweet girl who used to wake me up so lovingly. Well she was DEAD TIRED and wasn't ready to get up. Anyway, he ended up getting up, and came in (like he always does, and if he doesn't I think it would upset me) and kissed me goodbye. It was sweet. That was about 6am. So my "new years kiss" that was supposed to happen at midnight, happened at 6am.Then I finally got up I'm going to say I got up about 10:30am. And started cleaning on the apartment. I had no where to go, and no television, and the internet was not working, so what better to occupy my time, clean the house. Well I cleaned off and on, and rested off and on. It was my day off, I wasn't going to go crazy cleaning the apartment. I had gotten alot done between the time I got up and the time Adam got home. (Nothing happened after Adam got home, well no more cleaning) After he got home, we messed around the apartment for a little bit, Adam took a shower, and we went to McAlisters for dinner. We came home, Adam set up his laptop, and we went to bed and watched..... Friends I think. Yes the lesbian wedding. So it was Friends.I stayed an extra nightI had planned to go home on New Years Day, but Adam convinced me to stay another night by promising cuddling I'm weak when it comes to cuddling, even though sometimes Adams cuddling ends in me being pinned in some over exagerated version of cuddling. (Adam is much stronger than I am.) Well I stay the night again, he gets up (I woke him up much nicer this time) and gets ready, kisses me goodbye, and goes to work, as I think, I should get up, I end up falling back asleep. My plans were to leave the apartment at 8am, Adam calls at 8:15, wakes me up and asks me if I can wait for the internet guy. I say sure, I think, depends on when he gets there. Well he got there and I leave Adams house around 11am. Three hours later than anticipated, but I left that day. :-)